I fell off the wagon today. So I’m not happy. It’s tough on the weekends with less to occupy me, and one slip engenders the next (as vertu the flour, one might say).
But this was my first weekend since trying to quit. And I am getting myself back up and trying again, because I can do this. And I’m going to. I think my technique is solid. I just put myself in temptation’s way too soon (if there ever is a time for that).
It’s going to happen. I think confessing here helps, as if I’m holding myself accountable to whoever reads this.
The count resets. Onward, upward: day one.
I’m trying to break a very bad habit. It’s been a problem for me for a long time, but it’s lately reached the point where I just can’t tolerate it or rationalize it any more.
One of my weaknesses is that I am not terribly patient. I want what I want and I want it now. Or at the least I want to see solid, measurable progress toward what I want. When I don’t see that, I tend to be angry. (Another weakness: I have something of a temper, and I can be a bully. Also apparently I have a weakness that precludes me from counting my weaknesses accurately.)
TRIGGER WARNING: discussions of violence against women in various forms
I just got back from the first monthly operations review (the big meeting the VP wanted me to set up for my boss’ boss and his peers). We flew out to Louisville Wednesday, spent all Thursday meeting, and flew back home this morning.
It was a fun trip. A bit on the whirlwind side, and I’m trying to bounce back from a bit of jet lag, but I had fun.